January.....ALREADY?

So here we go again. That year went by so fast!!! Resolutions. Resolutions. I can come up with 50!

1. keep more wipes on hand while changing the "fun" diapers.
2. spot clean the carpet each time instead of spraying febreeze on it....in Lizzy's room.
3. delete photos from photo stream where Lizzy looks "crazy" or it's blurry
4. bring Lizzy out more with us
5. eat healthier

Blah, blah, blah.........I get excited for a new year but dread making any resolutions. I feel like I HAVE to make these resolutions permanent for the rest of my life. Dang. That is why I hate making promises. I am seriously not a yes person. If I say yes, something could come up, and I look like someone that can't make a decision. So if I say maybe or it's possible, then I have an out if I need it. Sounds good right? Eh......

I have a lot of expectations for 2014. I want to accomplish a lot. My marriage will have it's 20th birthday:-) I love my Damon more than EVER. The stress of having a child with cerebral palsy brings so much stress but seems minimal with a partner that WANTS to be there and gives genuine effort. He is the kind of dad that wants family outings to be with everybody. So bringing Lizzy out seems stressful but with him there too, it's manageable. My number one promise to Lizzy and my resolution for 2014 is.................

to include this child in all (or most) of our family outings. I realize that I just gave myself an out!! I couldn't help it.

Isn't she beautiful? Most of the time, she is happy and smiling. But then, there are those times when she isn't like this and I need to bail! Bail....as in "is this really worth it?" I know YOU know what I am talking about. Let's just take a family dinner at a nice, sit down restaurant. I generally feed Lizzy before going anywhere. So we will bring toys and other items that will make her comfortable. So ten minutes in to us being there a fork will hit a plate or dishes will fall in the kitchen...........LOOK OUT........we immediately look to Lizzy and it has scared her into a seizure! We are a family that would rather not have any attention on us so this makes us uncomfortable now because all eyes are on us. I want to bounce...get out of there. I immediately throw toys in the bag and Damon will say, "babe, relax, she'll be fine in a minute." 

I mean, I go into a night like that wanting to take two vehicles and expecting to leave early. But, he is right. With in minutes, she is back to herself.

I have never been embarrassed of Lizzy but would never want to make anyone uncomfortable and seeing a child have a seizure is just that.  Everyone feels helpless. But having seizures isn't the only thing that makes me want to scadaddle. She throws toys, squeals, cries, and screams. I have apologized to others having dinner near us for a toys that ended up on their table or for a loud(er) evening than they wanted. I'm sensitive and always have been. I don't like pushing Lizzy on anyone or her condition.

I love Lizzy so much and want her included. She is our first born and part of our beautiful family.

So.....if you see us out, or anyone with a disability, have mercy on us. We like to be out just as much as you do trying to do normal things too. Be tolerant. Be accepting. Be loving and smile at us. We probably need it.

Happy New Year and God Bless You!!!

Hanging at Target!! Listening to kids music. 

To 2014!!!!! Be safe.